It happened again.
Remember these chairs, the ones that got away? I’m still crying over them.
Today I took my lunch break at Home Goods, which is a mixture of retail therapy & torture that I’m not still in my new house. I checked to see if there were chairs that I love (yes! navy scroll! already sold! damn it!) & then sauntered into the lamp section where two lovely tall faux glass lamps sat with aqua mini-pleated shades. It’s hard to describe, but was seriously delicious. Then I found two matching lamps that had the same we-are-acrylic-that-looks-like-glass, so basically the most toddler-friendly pretty thing ever. I thought for a minute about where I’d put them, thinking about maybe on the bar in the dining room or perhaps in the living room towards the back. Or maybe that would be too light & airy for the couches we own, but I could always do slipcovers. Then I snapped my fingers & was all, I’ll put the tall blue one on the foyer table. So I head back, not one full minute later & they were gone.
I never even saw it coming. They must have grabbed n’ ran. It’s like they know what they did, right?!
Here’s the thing, I dress like a homeless person when I go to HomeGoods on purpose so that people won’t follow me around because “Hey! That girl in the Old Navy plaid camp flannel must have awesome taste!” SAID NOBODY EVER. Really, the unbrushed hair & flip flops are all part of my genius plan to throw you off the scent of my impeccable taste.
Then I trotted into regular TJ Maxx to see if maybe they had stolen one of those lamps to sell for themselves & I saw this gorgeous scroll-filled black coat rack by the front door. I pondered it for a moment & then pulled myself away because those things are just so useless in reality. Five seconds later, I remember that the coat closet in my new house is ill-placed in the living room (wtf) & I NEED A COAT RACK. I spin on my heel & stop dead in my tracks because there’s this dude eyeing my coat rack & testing it for sturdiness. I wait. I tap my foot. He keeps looking. I tweet “OMG IT IS HAPPENING AGAIN!” but I think he could feel the hositility rolling off of me so he wisened up & walked away.
I grabbed that rack & it was pretty much like this: