I hate ragweed.

It makes my head pound.

& my eyes water.

Even the back of my throat itches.

& on Saturday, I tried taking Benedryl on top of my daily Zyrtec.

I couldn’t feel my face for six hours.

If that wasn’t enough, my eyes are so bloodshot that I look like a pothead.

But I swear, I’ve never done drugs.

Like, not even in college.

& not just in an “I didn’t inhale” way, Mr. Clinton.

What was I talking about again?

Oh, yeah.

I really, really  hate ragweed.