Soon, the Middle left for college. & I was alone.
But I grew into the stereotypical American teenager – cheerleading, honor student, choir, friends, with the strong desire to blast Britney Spears from my hand-me-down car’s stereo.
yep, that’s me at 16. in my ‘stang.
I was a good student. A decent athlete. I didn’t use the F-dash-dash-dash word quite as often as I do now.
& I hated my sister.
In all fairness, she hated me just as equally. Polar opposite girls, thrust into the same family from different backgrounds, personalities, & a wide gap in age. I hated her because my parents missed me cheering at Homecoming because she had therapy. I hated her because they missed Prom picture-taking because of her bedtime routine. I hated her because of the chaos she created by her attitude – & when I locked my keys in my car (like a typical new driver), I was shaking to make the phone call to my parents for help, knowing it would create more chaos. I hated her because she made me feel pressured to be perfect.
At sixteen, I felt her mere existence was an injustice to me. Looking back, the injustice belongs only to her. A young, lost girl thrown into an already established family with one hell of an entitled brat for an “older sister.” A “perfect” sister that held the bar way too high for her to reach. & she hated me for it.
You know those fun, silly romantic comedies where everyone says the wrong thing & in the end, ends up laughing together & hugging with really upbeat music? It was like that. Minus the laughing, hugging, & sweeping score. I would try to reach out to her, & she would pull back claiming she wanted to be nothing like me. OUCH. So I’d shrink back & shrug her off. & so we continued that painful dance for years as we both grew up.
& when I got married, she was not a bridesmaid:
Much to the anger of my entire family. But we DID NOT FEEL LIKE SISTERS. We did not act like sisters. We barely spoke. So while she managed the guest book, the girls who were my “sisters” stood beside me in the worst shade of green known to mankind.
Three years passed. Three years of awkward conversations, silent resentment, & misunderstandings.
Until a little blonde miracle occurred…
p.s. this is the last sad part of the story. the rest is really amazing.
It will come MUCH sooner than Part 3. I'm ready to tell y'all the best part!
Ah you're killing me with these cliff-hangers! Can't wait to read the rest.
How long …must we wait for happy endings?
Ahhhhh!!!! How can you end it there!? I am dying for more!
Can't wait to read the rest!
PS I totally had the same mustang as my first car!
Hmmm. I remember back from your TTC days when you spoke to your mom she specifically said it would be better if you did not get pregnant when the due date would conflict with your sisters graduation (June) but you and Nate decided to go ahead. This seemed out of character but makes more sense now.
Babies always seem to bring people closer together!
Way to keep us hanging on the cliff!!
I just found your blog today and it made me cry (well at least this unfinished portion):) I have always felt SO guilty that me and my sister did not get along either. At all. Ever. I'm glad I'm not the only one who wasn't best friends with her sister growing up. However, I can't wait to hear the happy ending !
I LOVE all the old pics and can't wait to hear the rest of the story….PLEASE HURRY…WRITE FASTER!
So the rest of the story is coming in like 5 minutes right? Because that's about as long as I can wait
Thank you so much for indulging me and it really was worth the wait! I am on pins and needles for the Happy Ending…don't keep us waiting so long next time ::wink::
I've been waiting for this for so long!! Please publish the next part ASAP!!
I so GET this story. I just do. And I can't wait to hear the rest- please hurry with it!
Why would we hate you for that? You were a child too B….remember that.
Thanks for sharing.
i know where this is going, because this is me!! when i turned 18 my dad got remarried and she had 2 daughters-one was 16 and one was 14. (my bio sister was 13). and i felt MUCH the same way you did. honor student-athlete-college bound, SS (the 16YO one) was a partier, a bit easy, and rude. she would drink beer in the kitchen bc my dad couldn't stop her and her mom wouldn't and she would cuss at my dad, steal my stuff while i was at school. then she got pg, by a guy she knew for 2 months. we had been trying for 2 years. i hated her more. then i got pg. after bella was born, it was like everything was reconciled. we aren't BFF's by any stretch, but we do relate like real people. =)
sorry to clog up your comments, but half the time i read your blog, i feel like i could have written it myself! i love it. thank you for sharing your life!
Is that color Celadon?!? Because I made my bridesmaids wear Celadon green (it looks almost identical to your dresses) at the time I thought it was AMAZING…when I got the pictures back I told my MOH "It looks like Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream threw up on all of you" and she agreed and only then did she tell me that she and the rest of my BM's were not a fan of Celadon.
I went through this similar situation with my sister. We never got along until I announced I was pregnant. After living 500 mi apart for 6 years, she finally made the trip down to meet her niece. Now we have a relationship and she's trying to make up for all of those years that she was a total bitch to me. Life is too short and it sucks that it took an adorable little girl for her to see that. I only wish my father felt the same way. Maybe someday…
Sadly, even those who are "blood" sisters don't always become close. My sister is eleven years younger – and lightyears away in personality/responsibility/in-touch with reality. Yes, we all baby her, but at what point do you offer the machete to cut the apron strings? Someone needs to do it…
It doesn't help that she doesn't really like kids…and I have FOUR of them!
Goosebumps.
Can't wait to read the rest.
I can’t wait for the happy ending!
Hanging on a cliff here, but that's typical for Tuesdays. Goodness Blair, between your blog and Lost, I'll be on the edge of my seat forever.
Noooo…I hate "to be continued"s!
Can't wait for part 4!
Gotta love babies
Ps. I actually am diggin the green dresses
Seems to me the person I'd be mad at would be my parents, not because they took in these kids (I mean, who would not?!?) but because they put all of her needs above yours, including prom and homecoming.
I'm blessed to have a sister who I'm extremely close to and always felt bad for my one of bff's who didn't have a sister, so I totally get your excitement when you learned you were getting one and also how disappointed you must have been when you didn't click or feel like sisters. I also get why you wouldn't want her in your wedding given the relationship you described up to now.
I can't wait for the ending. I think I know where it's going and I'm so happy for you. Sisters are the best!