just remember, women have been doing this since time began. you’re going to get to meet your baby soon!!!! and you’re about to realize what true love really is. believe me, you’ve never felt it. it will knock your socks off.
One emotional pregnant chick sobbing into a used tissue, coming right up! This description of labor absolutely made me tear up. I can’t wait to meet Harpie.
Let’s talk about Karma. I know it exists.
“But Blair,” you may ask. “How do you know what karma is? You are so perfect!”
Yesterday, during a pregnancy….well, not craving. But a pregnancy non-food-aversion-moment, I ducked into Brueggar’s Bagels for a tasty blueberry bagel & cream cheese. I thought, “Blair, you be good. Get the light cream cheese!” So I sweetly asked the bagel boy for light cream cheese, which he spackled on sparingly. I arched my eyebrow & suggested that he could put on some more. OH MY GOD the judgement in his eyes!! And I almost screamed, “Don’t you know that I am pregnant, you hair-net donned zit?! Don’t you know I needed this bagel 5 MINUTES AGO, yet you stand here in judgement of my cream cheese addiction?” But I smiled, thanked him for the extra cream cheese, & left with dignity & my lips sealed.
Karma enters the picture this way — after my first bite, I dropped the bagel cream-cheese side onto my crotch. Granted, I shouldn’t have been trying to back out of a parking space, fire up my iPod, and eat a bagel at the same time. But still — I spent the remainder of yesterday with a white smudge right in my girly-bits. KARMA, people. For calling almost losing my cool on him in the bagel bakery & calling that boy a “zit” in my head.
And despite his apparent perfection, Nate is also about to be schooled in the wicked ways of karma. Rule #1 — DO NOT EAT A PREGNANT CHICK’S FOOD. So why did I grab for my Cinnamon & Spice oatmeal this morning, only to find it gone?? Yet Nate’s Maple & Brown Sugar oatmeal, aplenty in it’s cardboard box. Why did he eat my oatmeal??? He knows that I loathe Maple & Brown Sugar and that I have to have a packet of oatmeal with half a banana each morning. And not to be picky, but my 12-pack of caffiene-free Pepsi’s has been quickly dwindling, despite my consumption of only 3! Suspect. And I doubt it’s the dog popping open a soda mid-day while she’s lounging on the couch.
However, Nate just called to say he’s bringing me a cheeseburger & hushpuppies. This should tip the karma scales in his favor, no? So maybe the man does know something about karma after all 
He always was a fast learner…
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